|At least I don't have to deal with wild 80's hair.|
To make a long story short, since my Year In Review post died of neglect in late December 2013, I am not the same person I was when I started this blog. I mean I'm still a bitter snarky ass bitch with a flair for dark humor that is probably single-handedly responsible for my fantastic romantic failure with the dames, but I also have a newfound understanding of the many things that I've been doing wrong all these years.
Aside from learning that I'm probably wasting my time with any chick who thinks romantic comedies are actually funny, I've also figured out that my lack of discipline has held me back considerably. I was officially diagnosed with ADD at age 21, and while I know it is considered extremely suspect as far as being a legitimate medical condition, I refuse to use it as a convenient excuse to be completely helpless. I don't know why, but suddenly I want to know everything. I don't want to be one of those people who couldn't tell their ass from a hole in the ground without the help of an iPhone app. I want to learn everything. I want to know everything. Everything from the fact that olives are actually fruit to what to do when your refrigerator suddenly starts hemorrhaging water at 3 a.m. The ADD meds seem to be doing their job. Huzzah!
All of these things are enriching and useful in their own way, but what I want more than anything is to improve the skills I already have. I have been a writer for twenty five years, if you count the disturbing shit I wrote when I was 7 that would make a modern-day child psychologist foam at the mouth. I have always had this gift and nourished it for many years. But I've become a lazy bitch over the past few years in so many aspects of my life. I can't abide by this.
So allow me to bring you up to speed. I'm currently employed at a place I'll call Blackbeard's Fish and Chips, just in case any work-related posts take a turn for the untoward. I'm also working on a novel, one that will either become the next Harry Potter or fail miserably; only time will tell. I suspect I'll find some success with this little piece of work, however, what with the popularity of demon hunting stories, which is the main theme of my novel.
|Replace hunky dudes with hillbilly lesbians and you have my story.|
So we're mostly caught up on the current state of affairs. Also I got some new ink.